


The Shoebox

by Wle0416



Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Mutual Pining, finding their way back, not canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-06
Updated: 2020-07-06
Packaged: 2021-03-05 02:08:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25116655
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wle0416/pseuds/Wle0416
Summary: Michael asks Alex to hang out, and he brings a surprise with him.
Relationships: Michael Guerin/Alex Manes
Comments: 15
Kudos: 127





	The Shoebox

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by a conversation with @theviewofmylife. And us wanting Michael to get the big, sweeping monologue.

When Michael suggests he and Alex meet up to hang out, Alex is highly skeptical.

Come over and discuss top-secret, heavily classified government conspiracies? Sure. But hanging out is something new for the pair.

And it isn't that Alex is opposed to it, he's just suspicious of what it looks like to just hang out with Michael Guerin. Their relationship is either hot and heavy, or lukewarm at best. They have always struggled to communicate in a way that makes them both feel seen and appreciated, and it's caused tremendous grief over their long history.

But Michael was extending an olive branch, and Alex was happy to accept it, though he was unsure what would ultimately come next.

They meet on a random Wednesday just as the sun is beginning to set outside the Crashdown. Alex is dressed for an informal dinner, while Michael looks like he's not only worked a full day at the junkyard but also bathed in the grease and oil.

He still looks ruggedly handsome, though, and Alex can't help but marvel at how his t-shirt appears to be painted onto his pecks.

Michael's carrying what appears to be an old shoebox, and he looks positively giddy when he spots Alex heading towards him. "Hey!"

Alex regards him carefully. "Did I miss the memo? Are we not grabbing something to eat?"

Michael smiles and gives himself a once over. "Sorry, I didn't have time to go home and shower. Figured we could go for a walk if you're up for it."

"A walk?"

"Yeah. It's when you put one foot in front of the other and get from one place to another."

Alex exaggeratedly rolls his eyes before crossing his arms across his chest. "Haha. What's up, Guerin? What's in that box?"

Michael brings the box closer to his chest like he's afraid Alex is going to snatch it from his grasp. "Can we just walk?"

Alex is sensing weird energy radiating off Michael, but he starts to walk away from the Crashdown and resigns himself to the fact this is about to be a strange evening.

Since things with Forrest had run their course, Alex had started reaching out to Michael more to check in on him and see how things were going with Max, Isobel, and Mr. Jones. He wasn't sure why it took his breaking up with Forrest to push him to make contact with Michael, but he'd always felt guilty about having daily contact with Michael when he was supposed to be invested in his relationship with Forrest.

It probably had to do with the fact that the love he felt for Michael was always pooling in his heart, even when he wasn't acutely aware of it.

"Nice night, huh?" Michael asks after they've been walking for a few minutes in silence.

Alex shrugs. It's a bit muggy, and he's not dressed for an early evening stroll, but he plays along. "I guess."

After another few minutes of mindlessly walking, Michael spots a bench and collapses onto it without saying a word. Alex stands by the bench, trying to keep the annoyance that's building inside him at bay.

"Guerin, what is this? I thought you wanted to hang out. We're just walking down the street, not talking. And you're holding onto that box like it's a baby," Alex expresses, the exasperation seeping out of him.

Michael looks up at Alex with honest eyes. "Sit, please."

Alex sits down, and Michael places the box between them.

"You know, it's crazy. I've lived here for as long as I can remember, and I never take walks. I'm always going from here to there, and I never relax." Michael speaks matter of factly; his eyes fixed on the gorgeous orange colors spreading across the sky.

"I know what you mean," Alex practically whispers, taking a minute to welcome in the beauty that is the New Mexico sky.

Michael nudges the box towards Alex, and their eyes meet. "Open it."

Alex picks up the box slowly, his heart rate accelerating. He realizes he's scared of what's inside, even though he has no reason to be.

When he opens the box, he feels foolish, as all that's there are folded up pieces of paper. Old receipts, lined paper, and even a bit of wrapping paper are stashed inside. They all appear to have writing on them, but Alex turns back to Michael before investigating what's written.

"What is this?"

Michael takes a deep breath and reaches inside to pull out a piece of folded paper. He opens it to reveal a letter, and he hands it back to Alex.

Alex begins reading, and he lets out an involuntary whimper a few seconds later.

"These are all the letters and notes I wrote while you were gone. I'd have these moments where I'd be working on a carburetor, and I'd think about something you told me once, and I'd write it down so I would never forget it. And the letters. I wrote a lot of them over the years, but I felt it was better not to mail them. I didn't even think you'd read them," Michael says the last words wistfully, with a sad smile playing on his lips. "I stashed the box a while ago, and I told myself to let it go. To let the memories go. Let you go. But it's never going to happen, Alex. I can't let you go. I don't want to let you go. The thing between us is always going to be there, and I'm not running from it anymore. I'm tired of going from here to there. I want to just be."

Alex's eyes are still on the letter, but he's taking in every word Michael has said, letting the words nestle into the place in his heart that only Michael occupies.

"I look like hell because I couldn't remember where I stashed the box. I was looking all over, and when I found it, I knew I'd be late if I cleaned up, and I don't want to be late anymore. I don't want to let you down. I'm here. I've always been here. And I'm not going anywhere."

Alex doesn't have words. He feels like he's smack in the middle of a rom-com movie's climactic scene, and he can't fix his mouth to speak actual words.

So Michael does the talking for him.

"I'm not asking anything of you. You supported me, and I tried to do the same for you over these past few months. But I need you to know that I'm going to show up for you. In whatever way you want me to. I promise Alex."

The tears have been threatening to spill for a while, and Alex finally lets them. He clutches the letter in his hands a little tighter and pulls it into his chest.

"Do you have a pen, Michael?" Alex finally bellows out.

"Uh, I think so? Why?"

Alex turns to look at the man of his dreams, sweaty, greasy, imperfect, but the only person he's ever loved. "I'd like to write down everything about this moment so that I won't forget."

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading as always :)


End file.
